Inner Thug

in honor of my roommate...paula anyone?!



New Life

i just spent a major chunk of my evening doing something that probably makes me more fully alive then anything else in the world. i got to hold baby macie who is just over 48 hours old. i not only got to hold her, but i heald her agaist my chest and got to smell her sweet baby scent and feel her sweet baby skin on my face. her skin is so soft it feels like touching air. she's beautiful. there is something about a baby that can reach to the deepest part of my heart.

Hidden Dreams

yeah, you have them. hidden dreams. dreams you've never mentioned. dreams you've maybe never even admitted to yourself. we all do it. why do we do it? why do we hide our dreams? hide our longings? well for one, we chalk up the "obvious" to logic. in doing so (and this brings me to my second reason) we limit God. our faith is weak. yeah, we have faith...but it's quite possibly smaller then a mustard seed. "i know you're huge, God...i know you CREATED this entire universe in just 6 days...i know you CREATE new human beings every minute of every day...i know you can perform miracles...oh wait a minute. that was back in the book of're not that same God..." oh, i'm sorry. i forgot God changed since then. hhmmm...
don't ask me where the sarcasm came from. when i started this entry, it wasn't my intent. (just blame boog or swznikki for this) mostly, i am talking to ME. tonight i am having a revelation. i have been alone for the past several hours. since this is not a regular occurrence, it's quite a dangerous opportunity. you see, today i experienced my very first alone time with a real drum kit. i have been taking lessons for several months now, but i am always being taught, and practicing with someone. or, i practice on my practice pad at home. (doesn't quite have the same effect) but, i got to hide down in my friend's basement with my very own borrowed real drums. with my very own sticks. (i actually own those) and let me tell you, for 45 minutes i went to town. alone. just me and my drums. now don't get me wrong, i am not good. i am sure it's quite an obnoxious noise to other people. but not to me. and not to God. you know why? because i am in LOVE. i am absolutely captivated by this instrument. i was sweating, laughing, dancing around, counting out loud and banging away on those things like my life depended on it. i was working hard. my arms are even sore. and my right leg. it's absolutely hilarious to me. i can't even believe i am playing the drums! the drums have been my somewhat hidden dream since i was 10. i remember the exact moment when i tried out for playing instruments and i got a PERFECT SCORE on drums. i have never forgotten that. and now, here i am 14 years later (yeah, i'm old, i know) playing the exact instrument that i know God put a desire in my heart for, even at the age of 10. my mom mentioned to me that she doesn't ever remember me mentioning the drums. hidden dream. it's always been in my heart...i have mentioned it to one person in my life, i think, before this year. i don't remember...but if my mom didn't know, it was pretty hidden. Buried even. well, God has once again brought life to some thing in me that was dead. hidden dreams. they're there. you have them. are you afraid? i am.


I wouldn’t even believe this story unless it happened to me…and well, it DID happen to me, so I believe it. Weird. Ok, anyway! This morning I got up at 4:45 am to go and ready the pastry case, clean, etc. our store because the CEO of Starbucks, yes, that’s what I said, STARBUCKS was coming. Not just our area or state, but the entire multi-billion dollar company C E O. His name is Jim Donalson.
They chose our store, out of all the Starbucks in Minneapolis (and for those of you non-locals, there are billions of ‘em) for Jim to do a video in. Now, I’m thinking it’ll be really cool to watch the video taken, see the camera’s, etc, etc. No, no, no. Get THIS.
Jim walks into our store, walks right up behind our counter, puts out his hand and says, “Hi, I’m Jim!” He meets all of us little baristas behind the counter, asks how long we’ve been with the company, and so I responded with my, “almost three years”. Then, he proceeds to congratulate me on becoming a Coffee Master. Needless to say, I was BEAMING. I couldn’t stop beaming. It was thee coolest thing! He just loved people, and it showed. He was so genuine and kind…and I thought…this is the company I am working for- a company that values and loves people.
Now, I continue to do what we do behind the counter, and all of the sudden Jim yells across the store, “Hey Abby!” Ok… (My head shoots up, looking over the Verisimo…err…the espresso machines for all your illiterates) and I say, “Yeah?” and he says, (yes, that’s right, the CEO of Starbucks) “Do you want to be in the video?” uumm…ok…not a second of hesitation here…me: “YES!” and he says, “Well come on!” and motions me over, so I hustle my booty right over there, and the next thing I know, I am learning lines and performing for a major motion picture! Oops…I mean, I did learn lines, and I did perform, but it was for a Starbucks video.
I got to start out by saying, (Oh, and keep in mind I got to wear one of those special mics that clips to your back and everything!) “Hey Partners! I’m Abby from Minneapolis!” Ok, how cool is that line?! We did a couple takes of different ideas…and the last one, Jim wanted me to “ad lib”. YIKES. He asked me questions on camera, and I answered and just spewed out stuff, and it worked! Obviously, it was God…guiding my thoughts, words, etc.
I do have to admit, I was kind of embarrassed, because I just FEEL my friends at work making fun of me. They never said a word, but I know it. The guys are now laughing at me, and calling me, “Hollywood”. (Yes, Chris, that’s right, I’m talking to YOU!) It is a bit hilarious, actually. The video comes out in November, and I get my own copy!
Swznikki, we’re having a party! What a blast! Who would have thought? It was such an honor, and an amazing experience. Chris (yeah, shout out to you again!) and I were chatting at a table, and Jim comes over and just starts asking about our lives, passions, goals, etc. He said that was what he loved most about his job…sitting and talking with US. That’s what I get to do every day…talk to my “partners” (umm…yeah, that would be other people that work at Starbucks…don’t mock) and customers. I get to love God and love people every day…while making the best coffee known to man on this planet!
I’ll be signing autographs at my official signing next month. A picture with me can be requested as well! :) I’m still beaming…
p.s. mother and father...Jim knew Haddon Heights, and Scranton!! He has a house in Jersey, and used to be the CEO for PATHMARK! ha!