Snowboarding

I hate when Chuck goes snowboarding.  I had never thought of snowboarding as dangerous, but when he got into an accident five years ago, it sealed the deal for my disdain of the sport.  We were just barely dating when I got a call from a friend of Chuck's who I had never met.  At the time, I don't think I had actually met any of his friends.  His name was Jon, who Chuck and I call "Chev", and he said that Chuck had gotten into an accident, was in an ambulance and had been in and out of consciousness.  It was one of those phone calls we all dread.  Chuck's accident included bleeding on his brain, a concussion, and a pretty scraped up and swollen face.  I felt sick inside.  The thought that would not escape me was, "I never told him I loved him."  Granted we had only been dating for less than a month, but I already knew with certainty I loved him.

Several days later when Chuck finally made it home safely, and I was finally able to see him face-to-face it was not the happy reunion I had hoped for.  He was pumped with drugs, and acted very strangely.  Our conversations were odd, and he was weird.  I was devastated.  To this day, I don't think Chuck realizes the extent of fear, and anxiety I went through during that time.  I don't think he can grasp how upset I was that, in my mind, he could have died.  To him the whole thing was no big deal.  Men.  When I left his house that night, I sat in my car in his driveway and wept.   

I have since worked hard at trying to keep my  man wild at heart- like every man longs to be and needs to be.  I have tried to support him in the adventures he wants to take, even though they all strike fear in my heart.  I would rather have him live fully, than me hold him back and make him feel smothered.  Ew.  So, last weekend my man went snowboarding.  I awoke that morning around 5am, unable to sleep, praying my heart out, and those prayers continued all day.  Thankfully God kept him safe and sound.

Soon, he will be going skydiving.  I probably won't be able to sleep for weeks surrounding that adventure.  I tell ya.

I'll give him one thing.  At least he looks handsome in his gear.