Respite in NOVA

It's nearly impossible to predict how and when Jesus will completely and abundantly refresh my soul. I feel as if my soul needs refreshing on a daily basis. But there comes a point in time where to the depth of me I am completely dry and worn weary. Mothering plus ministry life has a tendency to overwhelm me to the point of crazy, if I'm not careful.

 

Jesus watches over me so tenderly and knows exactly what I need, when I need it. Last weekend, I had the honor of attending a wedding shower in Northern VA (our home before we moved to PA) and decided to visit with some other friends while I was down there for a quick 30 hour trip. Every friend I visited with, every hug I received, every gift that was given, every conversation, every smile, every laugh, and every moment of prayer filled my heart until it was practically bursting with joy. Jesus is in His people. 

 

 

My dear friend, Denise and I met years ago through a Bible study. We ended up doing several Bible studies together, and had wonderful times in prayer for each other. God has used us in unique ways to bless each other during particularly tough times. Denise has been through unspeakable tragedy, but I've never seen Christ shine more brightly through anyone during such a dark time. Seeing her, and being able to look her in the eyes and hear her heart was something I've been desiring for a long, long time. Thank you, sweet Jesus.

Hear more of Denise's story here. (Via her interview with one of my favorite author/speakers, Priscilla Shirer!)

Here is the reason for the whole trip, the beautiful bride-to-be Amy!

 

Three amazing girls. They all hold such special places in my heart. Cindy (far left) and Kendall (far right) were both in my teen small group for 3 years, starting their 10th grade year. These girls and I have had countless coffee dates, small group parties, pre-Prom gatherings, times of prayer, times of talking through tough stuff, mission trips, and youth group activities together. I love all these girls to pieces. So proud of how they've grown into Godly women.

 

Sharie (left) is the Mother-of-the-bride-to-be, and another dear friend! We were in a small group together with our husbands that we absolutely loved, we were housemates with our husbands on a mission trip to Croatia, she has watched Jovie (our dog) on countless occasions, and she is an all around wonderful friend! Such an awesome Mother/Daughter duo.

 

This is my amazing friend, and mentor, Candy. We co-led teen small groups together, met together regularly, prayed for each other and our girls, and she invested her whole heart into mine. I had asked God to provide me with a mentor while we were living in VA, and Candy is nothing short of a treasure to me. She hosted me in her home last weekend, and made me feel like I was apart of her family. She is a true gem.

 

Little Abby was another girl in my teen small group for 3 years. When I first met her, I could barely get a peep out of her. But one day she helped me serve at our church by organizing pastries for a big event, and we hit it off. I hadn't seen Abby in almost 3 years and it was an absolutely joy to meet her for coffee and hear all about her life. Love this girl.

 

My fabulous friend, Megan helped finish off my whirlwind weekend by treating me to the incredible restaurant, Sweet Water Tavern. We chatted for a couple hours straight. We laughed, we reminisced, we caught up, and we all-around had a wonderful Girls Night Out! This is one awesome girl.

I literally just took a big breathe and sighed. I am refreshed. I am renewed. I am filled up. I am overflowing with gratefulness for the gift of the body of  Christ. The gift of the love of Jesus that pours out through His people.

Overcome Me!

Last night I was boiling fresh from a Pennsylvania farm corn on the cob. I had set the timer and then moved on with dinner prep, which also inevitably included breaking up a toddler WWE tournament. Sigh. Right in the middle of one of their matches, I heard this sound in the back of my mind. It took a couple moments for the sound to register in my brain as BOILING water BOILING over. Sizzling. Splashing. Lid rattling. Explosion ready to happen. I sprinted to the stove to turn down the burner, and tipped the lid to let some air in…ahhhh. All was well.

If only dealing with the pressures of life were that easy. I feel sick to my stomach thinking about it. The pressures of life. Ick. They make me feel on the verge of blowing the lid off my mental boiling pot at any minute.

Let’s just start with emails. “Are you going to be joining such-and-such group in the Fall? Please respond ASAP.” “Do you need child care for such-and-such group. Please sign up ASAP.” “Here are the notes for such-and-such. Please study them ASAP.” “Here is the calendar for the year for such-and-such. Please let me know if there needs to be any changes ASAP.”

Then there are the texts to reply to, the social media to keep up with, the (occasional) voicemails to respond to, the thank you notes to write, the birthday cards to send, the person to reach out to, the treadmill to walk on, the weeds to pull, the walls to paint, the blinds to put up, the car that needs to be fixed, the bathrooms that need to be cleaned, the dirty AND clean laundry all over my bed that needs to be dealt with, the size 24 month clothes in my son’s drawer that need to be given away because he’s wearing size 3T clothes that I pull out of a tub every day! And on, and on, and on, and on….

I know you feel me. I have so much to do on a moment-by-moment basis, and what do I almost always end up doing instead? Watch TV. Scroll through Instagram. Swipe through Twitter. Check my email- again. See what’s going on in the Facebook world. Dumb FaceBook that we all love to hate, but can’t seem to know what to do with.  Sigh. Huff. Puff. Dangerously close to blowing my house down with the pressure building inside me.

All this for what? To lay my head down at night and desperately try to shut out the day- all I didn’t get done, and all I have to do? With tears in my eyes, and a mind that can’t take it anymore, I am saying it’s time to be done.

Jesus says, “Come to me all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” “Be still.” “I lead you beside quiet waters.” “I restore your soul.” “When you are weak, then I am strong.” “My peace I leave with you, my peace I give.” “Quit striving, and know that I am God.”

The Spirit comes when I am still. Quiet. When I put the kids down for a nap, and shuck the corn outside in the fresh air and sunshine -no music, no Netflix. Stillness. When I read a book written by a Godly woman- wisdom for my soul. When I cook with fresh herbs from my neighbor’s garden, and reflect on such sweet gifts given to me. When I take the kids for a walk outside and share the troubles of my heart with Jesus instead of walking on the treadmill and watching Gilmore Girls. When I listen to worship music while driving in the car and soak in the beauty of the mountains that surround me.  When I begin to experience the Spirit’s presence in new ways, because I’m still enough to notice. To hear. To listen. When I read the Scriptures and experience peace. When I work on memorizing a verse. That's when the Spirit pours out.

He's beckoning me. The stillness, the quiet, the rest for my soul. I have to fight for it. I have to say no to distractions. I have to be disciplined. Ugh, the D word. But I WANT it. I WANT HIM. I need the quiet. I need Jesus. I need the Spirit.

“Holy Spirit you are welcome here. Come flood this place and fill the atmosphere. Your glory God is what my heart longs for. Where my heart becomes free. To be overcome by your PRESENCE, Lord.” (Kari Jobe)

Jesus, overcome me by your presence.

 

Hello, My Name Is Abigail!

Hello, my name is Abigail. My birth certificate says Abigail. My license says Abigail. My passport says Abigail. Every single official document in my life says ABIGAIL. I tell people my name is Abigail. I want to be called Abigail. Some call me, “Ab” or “Abs” or “Babe” (Ok, maybe only one person calls me that.) or “Auntie” or “Aunt Abigail” or “Mama”- all names I love to hear. All names that bring joy to my heart. All names that fill me up with respect, affirmation, and affection. All names I like to be called.

I borrowed the title to this post from my great husband. Several weeks ago, he spoke to a group of people in their twenties (How am I not in my twenties anymore? Like, not even close.) on our names. There are many instances in the Bible where God changed people’s names. Sarai:Sarah, Abram:Abraham, Saul:Paul, Jacob:Israel. And even times where people changed their own names. Naomi:Mara. This says to me names are extremely important.

There is value in a name. There is meaning to it. If you don’t know the meaning of your name, I encourage you to look it up! There is power in a name. God has so many names it would take years of study for me to count them all. And each name of God means something completely astounding. I love that He is Emmanuel-God With Us. I love that He has a name that means God is There. I love that He has a name that means Healer.  I recently discovered that Jesus translates in the Hebrew to mean, “God delivers/rescues/saves His people”. Blows me away!
 
HE HAS RESCUED ME. There are days thoughts of My Rescuer slip to the back of my brain. On those days, or in those moments, I get caught up in my mind. I feel tangled in a mess of thoughts like seaweed snagged around the plastic piece of a six-pack. My brain feels like its twisting and tumbling and tied up. All my worries and fears and struggles feel like they will be hopeless to untie.

I used to be able to stuff the seaweed. I used to be able to tuck the tied up plastic six-pack into out of reach places, but that’s not working for me anymore. I’m a Mother now. I’m responsible for my emotional and mental health. If I’m not in a healthy place in my mind, then my husband and kids suffer of course, but I suffer the most.

What’s amazing is, the one Name that can untangle, untie, and sort out the mess is JESUS. My Rescuer. My Savior. My Deliverer. Jesus. My One. My Only. In the days or moments when thoughts of Him are slipping to the back, I call out His name. Loudly. Clearly. JESUS! And there is Peace. There is Rest. “The one the LORD loves (That includes ALL of us. That includes YOU, my friend.) rests between His shoulders”. Deuteronomy 33:12

Wherever you are in this season of life, wherever you are in the moment of just this day- He beckons you to rest between His shoulders. He beckons you to cry out His name. He calls you by your name, and you are adored by Him.

Abigail means, “Father’s source of joy”. I’ve always clearly known how much joy I’ve brought to my earthly Dad, but knowing I bring JOY to my Jesus takes my breath away. I find such joy in Him, and I’m brought to my knees in awe He finds joy in me, too. And in you.

So what does your Name mean? What do you love to be called? May your name be a blessing to you today!