ASM

i don't know when it happened- but it's one of the best things that has ever happened to me. somewhere during the past little while (quite vague, i know!) God has been teaching my heart to live FOR today, live IN today, and LOVE today. that means gone are the days i am living for what's next. gone are the days i am living for the future. gone are the days i am living for what i thought my life was supposed to be.

that doesn't mean i am giving up my dreams- in fact, it has helped me realize that i AM living some of my dreams already, and i wasn't even aware of it. i have been so blinded by my pre-conceived notions about my life, and where it "should" be that i have missed so many days of the HERE and NOW. today is a great day! and i mean that. even the past several gloomy, rainy, yucky days have been great. and it's not been about my circumstances- no! it's been about my heart.

God's powerful work in my heart- sweetly whispering to me that i am special. that my life is really special. that my heart is a treasure- and He dwells there. God has been tenderly showing me that He has created me for an irreplaceable role, and i am currently living it out! in so many ways, too. not just my job- although that is one! not just my writing- although that is one! not just my church- although that is one! and the list continues.

God is moving me in the direction of taking on an assistant manager position at starbucks. people have been surprised by this move- but only because i have been so against it in the past. i am finally coming to terms with things in my life- it's ok if i'm not doing what i "always thought i was supposed to do". God has me at a great company! God has me doing something that i, in fact, love doing. i've been fighting against my job for the past couple years because i thought i was worthless for being there. i thought i was not doing what i was supposed to be doing. i thought i was missing out on something bigger and better. i was trying to figure out what God wanted me to do- assuming it wasn't starbucks. and it's like all of the sudden, a light pops on (thank you daddy!) and i realize, "oh my soul. wait a minute. could it be that starbucks IS what God wants me to be doing?" i have been trying to figure it out for so long- and here it is, plain and simple. i AM doing what God wants! what a freaking relief!! what freaking freedom has burst forth from my heart! i am so happy!

and so it is. i am pursuing this ASM positiong- whole-heartedly, working it at with all my strength because i know this is what God is calling me to for this day. for this season.

seize the day.