i have imagined myself being a writer from the beach- sitting next to the ocean, the breeze gently blowing wisps of hair around my face, the beach sprawled for miles beside me, the sun blazing miraculously above me, the story flowing from my pen...never have i imagined myself writing from THE SURGICAL FAMILY LOUNGE. there are three rooms full of chairs, a couple flat screen tv's, a coffee area for family's of surgical patients only, and a computer room, where i am currently residing. johnny is on the computer next to me. we just said our hard- oh so hard- good byes to my dad. we got here (university of penn hospital) a little before 6:30 this morning. my mom, aunt cynthy, john mark, mel and peg walker, and pastor have all been waiting with dad, still in his normal clothes for 2 1/2 hours. we finally got called up, and went to a "new" waiting room. there, we stood and waited for only a moment before the guy in his scrubs came to get my dad. (i think it's a good sign that he was pretty hot!) we stood in a circle, pastor prayed, and i cried. i watched my tears drop to the ground and splat on the floor. my arms were around my aunt, and my mom, while my hand laid on top of my dad's. it was torture for him to get here so early and have to wait over 2 1/2 hours before being called. the surgery probably won't be for another hour or so. (it's about 10 am, east coast time) after pastor prayed, i watched as my mom and dad embraced. looking at them was too much to bear. i turned away, but the sound of my mother's sobs still reign in my ears. when it was my turn, i hugged my dad so tight. i could hardly say the words, "i love you..." and gave him a kiss good-bye. it's hard. it's surreal. but, God...oh God you ARE here. YOU are real. no matter the pain, no matter the fear, in fact...i don't think any of us feel fear. God's presence is here, and there is a peace. i'll write more later, we're about to go get something to eat. please know...above ALL else...THANK YOU FOR PRAYING...I AM SO THANKFUL FOR YOU ALL...keep praying for my dad...his surgery will be at LEAST 6 hours. more to come...