God IS Gracious!

I'm typing this from our amazing bed! From our own amazing home! And I just ate an amazing home-cooked meal. There is NO place like home. We chose Jane as Basye's middle name after my own Mama, but also because it means, "God is gracious". That is the resounding theme in my heart tonight. GOD IS GRACIOUS! 

To quickly answer some questions: 

YES, we are home! 

NO, I am still not allowed to hold my baby girl, but hopefully very soon. I am quarantined to our room, which is far FAR better than the hospital! We are manned here with gloves and masks. I could NOT resist squeezing my baby boy when we got home. He had already been around me all last week while I was sick, so I figured it would be OK for me to squeeze him with gloves and a mask on. I can't even explain how good it was for my soul to be able to bond with Jase in that small way. The smile on his face when he saw me was the most incredible gift. I HATED going upstairs and leaving my two preshies downstairs. But I know they are in wonderful hands with their Papa and my Mom- GG! 

YES, Basye and Jase are both doing beautifully well! They both head to the doctor on Friday for check-ups, and we expect great health. THANK YOU God! I would be sick for a million years to keep my sweet ones from having a day of illness. I'm SO THANKFUL I'm the one that's sick and not them. 

THANK YOU SO MUCH for praying us home! We still really need your prayers. I can't believe how complicated my illnesses are right now, and the amount of medication I'm on. It's overwhelming to keep up with it all. I've been under strict orders from multiple doctors that I have to rest, recover, and be very careful. I won't go into all the nitty gritty details, but would you please pray God's healing over my body? There is an awful lot attacking me right now, but I know God is FAR FAR more powerful than any infection or illness. 

I wanted to share one big need for me personally. As you have probably gathered, I am easily overcome by fear. The verses many of you have shared, and the prayers you have written have been a lifeline for me. I read them over and over and over again. I still find myself really battling fear- of many things. But the part that is especially  concerning is that one of the health factors I am dealing with is a high heart rate. Because my blood levels are so low, my heart is working extra hard. When my heart races, which is often, it makes me feel anxious. It happens so easily- even just turning to adjust my pillow makes my heart pound sometimes. 

Spiritually, I am realizing I have to really access The Spirit's power to fight agains the fears that plague me. When I become fearful about something- a thought in my mind, a worry over one of my babies, etc- my heart begins to race. I understand my heart will be racing because of my condition right now, but what I don't want is my fears to EVER have any influence over my heart rate. FEAR is not of God, and I don't want it affecting my heart rate. Since I am spending so much time alone, the tendency for fears to creep in is huge. Will you pray against fear with me and pray against fear affecting my heart?

Again, I am SO SO SO very grateful for the many powerful verses and prayers in Jesus' name that you have shared. Jesus is life! 

Thought you might want to check out the new little love of our life! She makes my heart just melt into pieces and pieces!! 

Can not say enough about the hospital staff. They had "Basye" leave me the most precious notes! Meant the world to me to have that video monitor to see her. Truly made all the difference. I could write pages about all the special nurses and doctors I met and how God used them in mighty ways to encourage us. We are SO THANKFUL. 

Her coming home outfit from my Mom that Papa dressed her in.

My Mom texts me pictures from downstairs. =) Chuck's sister, Becky, made this beautiful blanket.